Feeling safe, relaxed, energized and having presence in a safe situation.

Recognizing how I feel inside my body, when I am safe.

Our growth blossoms…

Before we begin, we need to take a look at the “Making our inner child feel safe” exercise.

Every child has a legitimate need to be noticed, understood, taken seriously and respected.

What if a parent was unable to give us unconditional love and attention because they were in need of their own assurance? Would we still be looking for our own assurance because of what we picked up from our parent’s affect?

As a small child we look into our parents face as a mirror for how wonderful we are.

If we saw a parent’s face filled with the expectations and fears, they themselves had… we may have empathized with how they felt and been understanding of why the mirror was not smiling when it saw us.

If a parent was unable to enjoy watching us play, be understanding of all our emotions and enjoy every moment of our lives, we may not have learned how to do that ourselves.

If we love who we are when we are our authentic self and give ourselves the good feelings we need, we choose good situations, people and goals for ourselves, we do not have to chase after admiration from people that would use us, to feel good.

If we do not understand how important it is to be able to love ourselves all the time, we will not feel completely safe deep inside.

When we can let our inner child out and feel comfortable asking for what we want and need to be playful, happy and ourselves, we are able to create a safe environment.

Return here after you finish the “Making our inner child safe” exercise, if you are not sure you are capable of letting your inner child out so that you can be the authentic version of yourself, in your work,  home or life.

If you are not in a completely safe situation, this exercise will not work. A person must be in a safe situation, to rewrite an affect or illusion that is making them prepare for something, when it is safe.

Now that we are truly safe, we are going to do self checks to see if we have tightness in our body that is a type of self guarding, that prepares us for something bad, when we are in a completely safe situation.

The more we feel safe in our body, the more of an overall feeling of well being we will have.

If we are able to have a good feeling in our body when we are safe, we will become more ourselves and experience much more happiness. We begin by noticing how we feel when everything is fine and we should be relaxed. If we have some feeling that is altering us, we want to know what it is.

Step One- Finding what is going on that is preventing me from being relaxed and present.

Part One- Am I able to feel safe, relaxed and present?

Feeling if I feel safe in my body when it is safe, the exercise.

We do part one of the exercises one time to see if we are able to feel much more relaxed in a very safe situation. After we recognize that we are able to feel much more relaxed with very little effort, we realize that there is something preparing us for something bad to happen.

If we do feel much more relaxed, we want to continue for a week doing part two of the exercise to be able to recognize the feeling of the affect that is preparing us for something bad. We do part two of the exercise as much as 3 times a day, to be able to have a good understanding of what the affect that is not allowing us to be completely relaxed, does to us.

Part Two-Feeling what is going on when I should feel relaxed and safe.

Feeling what is going on inside my body that is preparing me so I do not feel safe, when I am safe, the exercise.

Click on the above exercise.

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Step Two-The exercise to feel safe in my body.

Click on the above exercise.

We are going to re-write what makes us prepare for something bad to happen, when nothing bad is happening. We found something that was preparing us in our body for something bad to happen for us.

The affect that prepares us for something bad when good things are happening, is sometimes so subtle it can be illusory. To begin the exercise, we bring in the feeling the affect created in our body as its way of preparing us. We experience the changes to our body this illusion gives as it alters us.

As we experience the feeling in our body, we understand and experience the affect and the tightening as an alteration to our clarity. Just as a nightmare will alter us even after we awaken so we have a hard time believing it is not real, the affect and preparation is altering us, when we create a better feeling we can perceive that it is an illusion and then we can rewrite it, to keep the good feeling and to let the nightmare go.

The next step is we let go of whatever feeling  the affect creates in our body, as its way of preparing us. We bring back the good feeling we naturally have in our body and allow ourselves to experience the sense of well being and clarity this good feeling gives us. This process re-records the good feeling and sense of well being as the memory we have associated with the old affect. We continue to relax, we let go of our thoughts and feel how we will feel normally.

We want to continue to do self checks when we are in the same safe situation and are not preparing for something later in the day. We want to be sure we have the feeling that we want in our body, the one that gives us clarity.  By being conscious of our new automatic preparation and the feeling of well being we have, we validate the new recording. The good feelings in our body and the experiences we will have that are wonderful, as a result of those feelings, will further reinforce the improvement to our operating system.