Healing with Love
What is different about the sages, prophets and great healers of humanity, is that during the course of their development, they were able to sharpen all of their skills simultaneously, not just the ones they had to perceive changes in the external world but they were also able to perceive what was going on inside them.
They were able to use all their senses at the same time, in balance with each other. In doing so, they achieve the highest level of perception and understanding in which the brain (or what is described as our heart) is capable. To reach this a person must reach a balance of emotion and intellect, dependance and autonomy, openness and self-differentiation.
To develop this a person must take a perception of something in and sense what it causes inside them. The next step is to integrate the understanding but remain to some degree detached from it so that it does not become something we identify with personally. These understandings are what we learn, as empathic healers.
Why are so many people “in their head” and not “in their hearts”?
Many people did not feel safe as infants. In their development these people may have been more comfortable about thinking as a way of understanding things, than feeling. If a person does not feel safe, they may be unaware of their own feelings. Fear has several stages and the first stage of fear, is where our brain puts all our energy and focus into thinking about what is outside of us. Much like a small animal that is frozen in place looking to see what to do to avoid danger, when we are in fear our mid-brain, the place we “experience emotions and feelings” is shut down, we are not able to be introspective at this time.
In situations of insecure bonding, parents that are selfish, parents that are emotionally unprepared… a child crying may go unheard, a child connecting while experiencing joy may not see their parent smile. Because of fears, it is easy for a child to learn to hide its feelings or to express feelings they do not feel at all… but are expected for them to have. The child in this situation must use its intellect and protect its heart, to survive.
These same individuals later in their adolescence, may have felt uncomfortable with emotions. As a way of dealing with uncomfortable feelings, many adolescences and adults continue to suppress their feelings. Some people suppress their feelings for so long and do it so well, that it becomes hard for them to know they do it.
Suppressing feelings over time, can make it hard to experience our feelings without problems and will make it harder for us to understand our feelings later on.
The great news is, if a person that was not comfortable with emotions falls in love with someone that supports them in having all their feelings, they will be in a safe environment to rewrite the old conditioning or feeling of not being safe. After this happens a person can enjoy the pleasure of the beautiful emotions and experiences they were not able to have before.
